blue eyes

and the memories of you

Blue eyes,

endless summer,

it’s been a long time since you passed,

it’s taken me until now for it to set in,

i think of you and your shining blue eyes,

i sit here at my favourite park,

and i feel you sitting next to me on the bench

i see the outline of you,

just lingering,

just there,

but wanting me to feel you there,

i wonder how you would have aged,

handsome,

ruffled beard,

smile wrinkles,

less clumsy,

more together

you were my first crush,

the first time my heart,

recognised souls,

before my mind did

our paths interlinked off and on,

you dated her,

i dated him,

meaningful in its own way,

and wanting the best for each other,

but after that we reconnected,

hours of talking,

full of laughs,

full of becoming,

the angst of growing up,

the angst of adulthood,

through the years where we grew and grew

it’s hazy, those years,

full of insecurities,

full of self doubts,

but it’s your eyes i remember most,

your smile

and love of life

to live it every moment,

to be present with your eyes up

and your heart open,

on a level where many won’t understand,

you did what you needed to do in this lifetime,

there’s completion,

there’s evolvement,

you have more to do on the other side,

but i’m grateful you see,

when you come and visit

when you come and be,

i have the photo of you and i on my dresser,

and every now and then i reflect,

on what was,

what is

and what will be,

knowing you,

in the time where change and growth is vital,

shaped me to who i am today

in small ways,

in big ways,

i carry your way of living,

and your thirst for life,

so when you come and sit beside me again,

you are always welcome,

you can always be,

you’re still here i see,

just in a way where only you and i can see

lots of love,

love emm xxxxx